the end.

i don't promise to get through this without sinning.
and, where are we going anyway?
is there some final point at the end
of breaths that will mark the day that i arrive?
or, a simple reward system depending on my progress?
i promise it won't happen like that.
(i know i can't make that promise).
i don't play games with theology or eschatology.
i only know that i need him to hold me
even when i'm in fits of rage or jealousy.
or foolish dizzy dancing.
i need him to love me,
carry me somewhere
that i haven't been yet,
forgive me before i ever even knew
that it was wrong.